I’m sorry about all the mean things I’ve said about you over the years. To your face, even. They were nasty, uncalled for, and only somewhat true.
I really did, for the longest time, think I didn’t need you, that you just took up a lot of needless space, that you would lure me into your nefarious, cheating ways and away from my true love, Good Honest Cooking Over a Stove.
I realize now, and I have McGee and Bittman to thank for it, that I was underestimating you all this time. You’re good for so much more than just reheating rice. You make some amazing eggplant curry. And with a minimum of fuss!
Just like every other appliance in the kitchen, you too have your own special talents that you bring to my table. And instead of turning up my nose, I really should have welcomed you into my home. And I am sorry for that. For all the wasted time we’ve been apart.
I hope you’ll forgive me, Microwave. I’ll always leave room on the shelf for you. Bygones?
P.S. I will never again make fun of Joyce for relying so heavily on you.